If you want a formula for unhappiness, it’s to make your welfare dependent on other people’s choices. Do you find yourself “needing support” from those you love? Or approval from a parent or friend? Or permission from anybody to pursue your own path?

That’s not living, that sounds more like Slavery to me!

Don’t look to anyone else for your success or happiness. That’s your job, and your’s alone! You have to tend to your own welfare. Nobody else will, nor should they.

It’s absolutely great to give to others. God has given to all of us abundantly, and it’s only right that we give pay that forward unto others…but you don’t owe anyone anything and they don’t owe anything to you either.

The difference between people who master their lives and others who are slaves is quite easy to spot out.

Who sets their priorities?

Those who are free set their own priorities. Whereas the people who live their lives as “slaves” allow their priorities to be set by others, outsiders of their own lives. You’re life belongs to you and you alone…not anyone else.

Expect Less From Others, And More From Yourself

A great majority of people expect far too much from others, while they themselves actually get very little done. Distraction happens all the time, and it’s everywhere…expect it in others, but guard against it in your own life.

Know that everyone listens to their own favorite radio station in their mind: WIIFM, which is short for “What’s In It For Me?” We look and perceive every situation through the lens of “how does this effect me?”, or “what’s in it for me?” So don’t take it personally when you’re overlooked, your phone calls go un-returned, or when your help or kindness aren’t returned with a “Thank You.”

Most people are so unorganized and distracted that they only perform the most critical or urgent matters in their lives, living on “autopilot” most of the time.  But we’re all human, we’ve all do that on occasion, don’t we? And some of this self-interest, or self-preservation is just natural, and even healthy…But, be sure to use this knowledge and awareness of others in your own plans.

Here’s the overall, big picture principle:

If You Want Something To Happen, Take Control And Do It Yourself

Don’t get bitter when that person doesn’t keep their commitment to help you. It’s a waste of your time and energy to criticize others, and an even greater waste to pay attention to anybody else’s criticism of you. Just focus on getting better at doing what you do. That’s a whole lot easier than trying to get somebody else to change.

Nobody tries to be the villain or bad guy. Everybody thinks that the are the good guy. Everyone is the hero in their version of their own life story. We always have a reason for everything we do, even if it’s impractical or has bad consequences. With that said, people who are troublesome are not worth changing. Don’t waste your precious time complaining about them.

If someone hurts you, it’s not about you and you don’t need to act like it is either. People do the things they do because of how they foresaw the situation through their own life lens. So, just learn from it and determine what you can do differently the next time something similar happens, and then forgive that person and move on. I truly mean you need to forgive them completely too.

Now, some people get hung up on the idea of forgiving people, so let me clarify. Doing so doesn’t mean you think whatever they did was “okay”. That’s absolutely not the case. But if you don’t forgive somebody, you’ll never be able to let it go, and that only leaves you with carrying the burden of anger and bitterness with you everywhere you go.

Carrie Fisher, an American writer, once wrote, “Bitterness is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” The original hurt was bad enough for you, why carry around bitterness that is only hurting you and not the person you’re holding the grudge against? That only preserves the original hurt for you to constantly remember it. So, forgive people when they hurt you, and then let it go.

Everyone Has The Same Minutes And Hours In A Day

Everybody alive is given the same amount of time each day, so when we compare our achievements and successes to others’, the only difference is how we spent those hours.

You decide how to spend YOUR TIME and you make that choice every minute. And even with all the good or bad decisions you’ve made in your lifetime, you can CHOOSE to begin to turn your life around in a second!

All you have to do is decide to become better, and make better choices. But it doesn’t really matter how much you think about or intend to change, your life will only start to change when you take action. So, begin with one little action in the right direction, without expecting immediately successes.  Your positive efforts will compound one at a time, and within time, you will see yourself moving in the right direction.

The quality of our lives only comes from what we DO.

Experiences come to us in moments…and those moments will keep flying at each of us until we die. Each one is a gift, an opportunity to change our lives, and it’s up to us to take advantage of them.

All of this comes down to one word: DECIDE.

You can choose the direction of your life at any moment you choose. Right now may just be that moment.

So, don’t let others determine your course in life, it’s okay to DREAM BIG! Where do you want to go from here? How do you want the next chapter of your life-book to be written? It’s Up To You!